Don’t Let Tomorrow Steal Today From You
by Jack Ulcer
A man walking down the street was asked what he would do if he won 10 million dollars. His answer was that he would leave his wife, quit his job and become a playboy.
Maybe this fellow was serious, maybe not. But when I heard his answer, I started to think about this man whose dreams and parts of his real personality are hidden behind the mask of his restricted financial resources. I started to think about him going to work, everyday, hoping that one day he could afford a lifestyle that would allow him to break free from his daily routines and escape from the watching eye of his boss. He would be ready to change his life completely, if he would just have the financial means to do it. He would also maybe carry out a hidden plan to tell his boss what he really thinks about him or her and leave the spouse behind who does not match the picture he has painted in his mind of a dream partner. All his plans are lying there in hibernation, waiting for the day that allows them to step out into the sunlight. Waiting for the day he can take off his mask and leave it all behind and wave goodbye.
I don’t think this man is the only person who would change his or her life substantially, if the financial situation would allow it. His planned changes are probably much more radical than most of us are thinking about, but he is still an example of a person who is not entirely happy with his present life and eager to open a new chapter when, and if, the opportunity arrives. All of us have probably sometimes contemplated our future circumstances and thought about the opportunities and changes money and success could bring. This does not of course mean that we are all planning to leave our current jobs or partners if we make it big, but most of us perhaps have some sort of a desire to improve parts of our lives and a plan to create more happiness through wealth and success. Our plans and desires are different, but most of us want to change things for the better, whatever the better in each individual case might be. No big surprise there.
But before we continue on the path of creating a better future and living the good life in our minds, we should stop for a moment and think about the life we are living today, and look at who we really are. Do we treat our current life too much as a stepping-stone to something better and more glorious, and forget that today is also a real and concrete part of our lives? We shouldn’t forget to live in the present just because it’s not reflecting the perfect picture we have painted in our minds. What does our current life become, if it only exists because we have not been able to hit the jackpot yet? What if the unexpected happens and we never make it to the big league? Was our life then just a masked effort to break free from the life that was never quite good enough for us, or does our life actually become a real deal at that very moment when we realize that making it big might never happen? Did we forget to live the life that has dragged along with our efforts to build a future that would allow a complete financial freedom and a platform for our true personality to flourish? Was our life like the Amazing Race, where the million-dollar prize shone so bright that the changing surroundings were hardly noticed by the participants running blindly toward the goal?
It is admittedly not easy to always fully enjoy the present moment, especially if our ambitions are high and the goals we have set make our lives extremely hectic. It can be difficult to value and appreciate our current situation, knowing that there is so much more that could be ours. We see all the astounding villas on TV and people driving luxury cars to five-star restaurants and enjoying life without financial restrictions. We see clearly the lifestyle that we one day want to have and we work hard to achieve this goal and sometimes make compromises that facilitate reaching our final target.
But in midst of all the ambitions and hurry, we should also remember that we are alive today and have people around us who need us today. We should not put decency, friendliness and love on hold for the sake of a future that may or may not be there. We should not let the future hold us down today, but instead, try to value the good things we have now and strive to find our real personality already before we become successful and wealthy. Surely we cannot tell our boss that he is a jerk, if we need our job, but we can still try to be ourselves as far as possible and remind us that sometimes unpleasant experiences make the drive for success stronger and will make us appreciate our accomplishments even more once we get to the place we want to be in. We can try to make most of our lives already today and, at the same time, continue working toward our bigger dreams and goals. If we meet the goals and fulfil our dreams, we can at least look back and realize that we have been alive all along.
We should also try to keep in mind that the moments of glory are sometimes short and the happiness stemming from a reached goal or a fulfilled dream may not last forever. This might be particularly true, if success and money come quickly and unexpectedly, but regardless of the source of our financial freedom, the contentment may start slowly fading away once we have reached the place where our dreams and goals have materialized. We may ask “What now? I am a millionaire, I drive a Ferrari and I have my dream house. What now?”
The question we can ask in that situation is, are we truly happy? Forget the occasional good feeling coming from the envious looks of our neighbors when we pull into our driveway with our $100,000 car, or the surprised looks on people’s faces whey they see our amazing house, but are we truly happy? Are we truly and genuinely happy with our lives?
If the answer is yes, you are a true winner in life. You are not a winner only because you have made it financially, but you are a winner because you have managed to reach a happy state of mind. Happiness, in my opinion, is the true goal in life, and money, fame and fortune are just servants of king happiness. I also believe that happiness inside a rich man is exactly the same feeling as it is inside a poor man. You cannot put a price on a feeling. It is something that is inherently in us and something that different things in life can trigger. Money and success may be one of these triggers, but they are not the only ones.
It may happen that we have plenty of money and success, but we have sacrificed too much to reach the lifestyle we always dreamed of. Maybe we forgot to live life while we were busy getting wealthy, and missed parts of our best years. Maybe we acted disrespectfully and unfairly toward others while creating our fortunes, and now, when we are finally wealthy and successful, feel that it’s too late or hypocritical to fix the damage. Maybe we forgot that true decency and genuine desire to help others lies with people who help and are decent already before they become wealthy and successful. Maybe we have lost our true friends and have replaced them with acquaintances who are financially on the same level, but don’t have the strong bond of a life-long friend? Maybe we have realized that money needs good friends and family to reveal its true worth. Maybe we have just sacrificed too much and cannot feel true and genuine happiness inside us. We are rich and successful, but are we truly happy?
Happiness does not always come with a change in material circumstances. We have maybe abandoned our previous lifestyle and moved to something that we thought would fill us with real happiness and enable us to feel more confident and even invincible. Maybe we enjoy the feeling that we don’t have to please people anymore and we don’t have to listen to a demanding boss anymore. We might enjoy the feeling that no matter what we say or do, we are still going to be ok, because we don’t really need anybody. We have money and nobody can hurt us. We don’t need a job or our current partners, because we have options. We can always find a new partner and withdraw more money from our bank accounts. But are we genuinely and truly happy?
It is undoubtedly respectable to set high goals and have the desire to be wealthy and successful in life. It is however also good to be realistic about the effects of the hard pursuit of prosperity and sometimes ask ourselves, what is the price to pay for the future, and how much we are willing to sacrifice to reach our goals? Am I sacrificing so much that my goal will be eventually tarnished by the very actions that were necessary for reaching the goal? Am I wearing a mask and only ready to remove it until I feel that I have enough money to be truly myself and reveal the true life I want to be living? Am I honest to myself and true to the people near me? Am I building success separately for myself, or am I building it on top of the life that I am currently living? Am I going to be happy when I finally have the chance to remove the mask and show the world that I can finally do what I want to? Will the happiness last?
You may think that it is premature to ask all these questions and try to contemplate the effects of success and money before anything has even happened. Why not just go for it and forget the consequences and see what happens when you are rich and powerful? You may think that you will be 100% happy when you have reached the target of being a millionaire and think that whoever says something else does not know you. Maybe you are right. Maybe you will be 100% happy and maybe it is premature to ask all these questions – I don’t know. However, trying to enjoy every moment of this short life is still probably a safe bet and may provide some balance for the days when you don’t have to worry about money anymore.
I hope that all of us who seek success will find it along with the happiness that may come with money and fortune. However, I also hope that we remember that life is a journey and most parts of the journey are needed to reach the final destination, whatever it may be. We should be able to travel the whole distance as ourselves, without too thick of a mask holding us down, and without forgetting to look around once in a while. There may be a golden city waiting somewhere along the way, but we should sometimes stop and think about which route we are choosing to take to reach the city and what we are we going to do once we get there. Is the city going to change us dramatically or are we going to use the treasures for the benefit of others and ourselves in a balanced way? If we travel carelessly and too fast, the glimmer of the golden city may start fading sooner than we thought.
Jack Ulcer
Twitter:JackUlcer
We should remember that we humans are all on the same boat of life and carry similar hopes and similar dreams. We are all born with a need to be respected and loved. Born with a need to be someone. Someone successful. Someone decent.
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